WoW Gold Facts

WOWGOLDFACTS.COM IS A YEAR OLD, KIDDIES!!!



THANK YOU TO MY LOYAL READERS FOR THEIR UNWAVERING SUPPORT. THANK YOU TO THE FOLLOWING GOLD SELLERS WHO IMPRESSED ME WITH THEIR SUPERB SERVICE AND SHOWED ME THAT THERE ARE HONEST SITES OUT THERE WHO WALK THE WALK AND TALK THE TALK — IGE, MYSUPERSALES, GAMERKING, AND WOWGOLDPIG.

THANKS TO WOWMINE, MY FIRST VICTIM AND SUBJECT OF MY FIRST POST ON MARCH 31, 2008, FOR CONSTANTLY GIVING ME REASON TO MAKE FUN OF THEM! OH, THANKS FOR THE CAKE YOU SENT ME. IT WAS DELICIOUS:



Kidding.

Now back to the VCPit.com review….

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3 Comments »

Oh sweet Jesus, something’s wrong with my PayPal account again…

Help, Remus.

I quickly dialled Remus’ number, hoping to catch him before he hit the sack. I quickly explained my PayPal debacle and Rachel’s birthday gift.

"Dude, I swear I’ll pay you back ASAP!"

"I’m doing this for Rachel and not for you or your silly site, okay?" he sighed.

"Yes!! I love you, Remus!"

"Please don’t say that."

"Go to VCPit.com and get a thousand gold for Rachel. Her toon’s name is XXXXXXX and realm is XXXXXXXX. Please take screenshots."

‘Fine. Stay on the line while I place that order."

"Ok."

Silence, then..

"Is this a porn site? Because if it is, I’m not buying." He suddenly said.

"What? Er, no, VCPit just put that babe’s pic there to attract horny, desperate idiots."

He snickered. "And their method has proved certainly successful."

Did I just insult myself?

"Okay, done. I’m emailing you the screenshots shortly."

"Remus. I –"

"Please don’t say you love me, I beg you."

————————————————————————————-

True enough, he took and sent screenshots, which I had to edit to hide some details.

(Click for a larger image)

"You must retrieve the gold at once in order to fend off the RMT radar and the seizure of gold by some malignant game masters." - LOL. Sounds like something you read in a cheap sci-fi novel. Ah well…

Now to wait and see if VCPit can redeem itself in 5 minutes or so.

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2 Comments »

Okay, here’s the long-awaited review, plucked from one of your suggestions. Congratulations to VCPit.com for being the chosen one. Now who is VCPit.com? Beats the hell out of me. Never heard of ‘em. But we all love checking out the newest WoW gold seller on the block, even if there are risks involved.

So here goes nothing…

(Click for a larger image)

Okay, can someone make sense of the homepage news? What does Anne Hathaway have to do with virtual currency?

So, all our WoW players, are you ready for the adwards you’ll get since the purchasing on VCPIT you’ve made in 2008? We are grateful to all our faithful customers! Your great support to VCPIT had made our blossom possible. Here is how we want to thank your support. We will look at your 2008 purchasing record and reward accordingly — the more you have bought, the better coupon code  you would get. Claim your reward now!!

2009, VCPIT will share you a more plentiful and gloriouls WoW year!

"Adwards’? - You mean like the Clio Awards for advertising?

‘…made our blossom possible." - WTF is that supposed to mean?

"VCPIT will share you a more plentiful and gloriouls WoW year!" - You just gotta love ‘em typos.

Okay, if you think that THAT is the reason I chose VCPit.com, um….

Guilty as charged!  XD

Hehehe.

"Eye popping candy" - Dang right it’s eye POPPIN’! Cletus took one look at her and shouted, ‘Dude, look at the fun bags on that babe!’  Couldn’t have expressed it better myself.

"Besides, WoW players have much to learn from her: Augment the wow gold inventory by purchasing at VCPIT. manage your asset." - Woohoo, I’d love to manage that chick’s assets!

"VCPIT celebrates the Denise’s exemplary worldliness in asset management." - Cletus and I are sooo ready to invest!

"Our Philosophy: Be sincere, placid, thankful and responsible." - Kinda hard to be placid when you’ve got that chick staring at you like that.

Okay, moving on…

Let’s learn more about VCPit.

The heck…

"Empowering [the rural area farmers] to lift themselves out of poverty" by serving the online MMOG game communities while staying at their own place keeping their farms and agricultural livings intact and undisturbed." - I..I don’t get this…

Their About Us page if too profound, I’m having a nosebleed. I think I’ll just contact their live help for more info. And of course, checking out their Live Help is Wow Gold Facts tradition.

Note: Chat transcript is available in text format at the end of this post)

Gawd, that chick agent again. Must cover her face.

We’re off to a retarded start, folks.

5 minute delivery? This is spooky, people. Is VCPit.com one of WowMine’s minions?

Very very poor customer service. If their queue is so bad, then maybe they should hire more agents! And if I may add, agents who can comprehend and speak better English and who can survive outside the realm of canned text!

Obviously not the most satisfying pre-sales service I’ve ever had. I give VCPit.com a zero in this category.

To order or not to order…

Well, since i owe you kiddies a review, I may as well order. And since I owe a very good friend and guildie of mine (no, not Remus or Cletus) a birthday present, I think I’ll just have the gold sent to her toon. Rachel will love that!

I dialled Rachel’s number.

"Hey, handsome, long time no talk!" is the first thing she chirped on the phone. ‘Handsome’. She’s the only one who calls me that without snickering. Rachel is a lovely person and I’d date her if only she didn’t like girls. Just my luck, eh?

"I missed your birthday and I’d like to make up for it by giving you some WoW gold,’" I said.

"Woot! Woot! I am sooo not saying ‘no, you shouldn’t bother’! I now love you more than ever!" she cheered. God, she just kills me.

"Okay, well, expect it soon." I said.

Expect it soon.

Famous last words.

———————————————————————————————-
Chat Transcript

info: Please wait for a site operator to respond.
info: You are now chatting with ‘amy’

amy: Welcome to our live chat support. How may I help you today?

Apu Nahasapeemapetilon: Hello Amy.

Apu Nahasapeemapetilon: I would like to buy 3000 gold. How soon can I receive it?

amy: how much gold would you like to buy

Apu Nahasapeemapetilon: Er, I just told you: 3000 gold.

amy: plz tell me your faction/server?

amy: let me check for you

Apu Nahasapeemapetilon: Scilla US: Horde

amy: Please hold on a moment while I am checking.

Apu Nahasapeemapetilon: Kk

Apu Nahasapeemapetilon: Hello? It’s been 7 minutes…you still alive?

amy: ok

Apu Nahasapeemapetilon: Ok what?

amy: you can place your order now

Apu Nahasapeemapetilon: WTF? I asked you how soon I can receive my gold IF I order from you guys!

Apu Nahasapeemapetilon: You didn’t answer my question.

amy: we can sent you 5 mins

Apu Nahasapeemapetilon: 5 minutes????

amy: in 5 mins if you place your order now

Apu Nahasapeemapetilon: Now why does that claim ring a bell?

amy: yes

Apu Nahasapeemapetilon: You connected with wowmine.com, by any chance?

amy: what claim?

Apu Nahasapeemapetilon: ‘Cause they’re the only lying retard I know that still claims 5 minute deliveries.

amy: we need time to auditing your order

Apu Nahasapeemapetilon: And it’ll take you only a few minutes to audit my order. Ha! Okay, since you won’t answer my wowmine question, I’ll just move on to the next question: do you have enough stock on my server?

amy: yes

amy: we have check the gold market for you now

amy: just now

Apu Nahasapeemapetilon: Whatever the hell that means. How much is 3000 gold?

amy: if you place your order,you can check the price on the home page

Apu Nahasapeemapetilon: You have any idea how unhelpful you are? Shame on you.

Apu Nahasapeemapetilon: Check it out myself…ha.

Apu Nahasapeemapetilon: I can tell you’re not interested in my business, Amy.

amy: no,

Apu Nahasapeemapetilon: You have the enthusiasm of a sloth on downers.

amy: because there is so many people in the chatroom

amy: i don’t have enough time to check for you

Apu Nahasapeemapetilon: Ah I see. Because there are "so many people in the chatroom" you have the right to be dismissive.

Apu Nahasapeemapetilon: OMFG

Apu Nahasapeemapetilon: Your customer service is the PITS!

amy: no,we welcome anyone to place order in our webstie

Apu Nahasapeemapetilon: LOL.

Apu Nahasapeemapetilon: Whatever, sweetheart.

amy: no matter how much the gold he will buy

Apu Nahasapeemapetilon: IF I choose to buy. But after our scintillating conversation I don’t think I will.

amy: plz trust us

amy: we will fufill your order asap

Apu Nahasapeemapetilon: Other gold sellers’ live chat agents are always more than happy to provide price info. They don’t tell me to check it out myself. They don’t use the queue as an excuse to brush customers off.

Apu Nahasapeemapetilon: Last question before I go and leave you in peace: how old is this company?

amy: so sorry to make upset

amy: but if you place your order ,we will handle your order now

Apu Nahasapeemapetilon: ANSWER THE QUESTION: HOW OLD IS THIS COMPANY?

amy: we have the excellent history

Apu Nahasapeemapetilon: Forget it. I don’t think you’re comprehending anything I tell you. Talking to you is like talking to a robot low on batteries. Bye and have a nice life.

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8 Comments »

Total Hoax, I mean, THSale is now quoting delivery times. Is that progress, desperation or what?



Must be desperation because someone told me (fine, it was Cletus doing his research again) that THSale has been doing poorly the last several months. What he meant exactly by poorly is for another post, since he couldn’t be persuaded to go AFK on his latest conquest in WoW (I hope for his sake it’s a real girl behind that pretty elf). And have you seen the list of complaints against THSale? Holy moly, if I had a dollar for every complaint out there I could finance a remake of Ben Hur.

I’m wondering if any one is actually still buying from this joker.

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1 Comment »

Hey kiddies, have you read the second installment of Nick Ryan’s article "Gold Trading Exposed: The Sellers" on Eurogamer.net ? Interesting read, don’t miss it. I’m still mentioned in the post, which it makes more interesting.

Seriously, I don’t know why Ryan keeps implying possible dirty links between RMT and organized crime - particularly one that involves drugs and prostitution. Just what our cause needs — an alleged connection with the lowest of the low.

This time he puts the spotlight on Chinese gold farmers, who talk about farming gold in the most repetitive fashion.  Imagine sitting all day farming - killing the same mobs, seeing the same monsters, working the same instance…dude, I love WoW but hell, if I did and saw the same thing everyday, 10-14 hours a day I’d go nuts!

But it’s that sort of repetitive task that feeds the Chinese farmers’ families. I’m hoping that at the very least they’re doing it in decent working conditions and not like the ones I hear from "urban legends" that talk about farming stations housed in condemned buildings. I’d be the first one to boycott a gold seller that treats their farmers very badly!

Moving on to other stuff, I was surprised to see that Swagvault agreed to be interviewed (hell, they even agreed to have their customer support photographed!). Most gold sellers wouldn’t touch reporters with a ten-foot pole, and I know they have all these no-press policies. Guess Swagvault wanted the opportunity to tell the whole world that they don’t do the shady stuff (yeah whatever, I still remember how their service sucked).  And dig the pic of Swagvault’s office building in Beijing. I told Remus it kinda looks like his parents’ Perry Street apartment but snooty little Remus snorted, "Are you implying that Richard Meier may have designed Swagvault’s office building in Beijing ?"  (Venomous emphasis on the last part, mind you)

"Whoa, dude, relax. I’m just saying it KINDA looks like your folks’ place."

Politically-incorrect Cletus guffawed. "They’re Chinese, they’re good at imitations, what did you expect?. Wait, who’s Richard Meier?"

Ehm, just go read the article, kids. And as always, feel free to leave your comments.

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The broken English alone is hilarious, but go check out Time2WoW’s newsletter copy from top to bottom. You don’t have to be a Master Proofreader to see what’s wrong with this one.



Where are 1, 2, and 3???

This one really gets to me: "No profit, only cheap gold for you!’ What the heck are they? A charitable institution? How do they manage to stay in business if they have zero profit?

"You will reach all your dreams in game only at Time2WOW." All our dreams, eh? Well, Cletus’ biggest dream in the game is to have cybersex with every desirable-looking female toon. Your claim - if true - should make him very happy (and very busy). Great Stimulating Plan! Two Thumbs Up! WOOT WOOT!

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3 Comments »

Even Massively has picked up on the Nick Ryan article "Gold Trading Exposed" .  Click here for the Massively post.

Nice to see that the article is getting more exposure. Now here’s what I think of the first installment of Ryan’s series.

1. I’m glad to see my answers fairly intact. One of the benefits of the interview-by-email format. I’m even letting slide the fact that my moniker changed a bit, but that’s the least of my concerns. Now is it my imagination or I’m the only person mentioned in this installment that is earnestly pro-RMT? I feel kinda outnumbered in this post but hey, maybe more from our side of the camp will be given print space in the next few posts.

2. I found Imre Jele’s saying that RMT is akin to prostitution a little extreme. Even more iksome is his reference to organized crime, which paints RMT in a more sordid shade. I don’t think he has the right to make such a harsh sweeping statement because as someone who’s bought gold from all sorts of sellers, I had the good fortune to do business with professional and ethical companies like IGE and MySuperSales who may very well be the bellwether in an industry that’s looking to be regulated. I’m sure there are other good apples out there that I haven’t reviewed that could set the standards on how RMT should be carried out but it’s unfortunate that the bad apples outnumber the good. Ugh, it’s going to be an uphill battle to get everyone to recognize RMT as a legit sector, especially with the likes of Jele making all these exaggerated and negative analogies and making it more difficult for other people to cotton to the idea.

3. On the first page, it says: "Secret or not, we all hate ‘gold sellers’." Again what’s up with such a sweeping statement? WE ALL??? Come on!

4. "Is gold selling like pornography: something more of us do than admit?" - I resent this comparison.

5. For a mere introduction, Mark Jacobs gets first dibs on virtual print space to add fuel to the anti-RMT fire and unfairly classifies all virtual curency sellers as the bane of the MMORPG Industry. Yeah we all hate spam. Go hate the spammers from the scammy sites but spare the honest sellers who are trying so damn hard to professionalize this sector!! Not all of them are the cockroaches you paint them to be!

Aaaarrghhh, must stay Zen or I will go nuts!

More of my two cents when Ryan’s second installment comes out.

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Remember my telling you that someone interviewed me for a piece he was doing on RMT for a game review site?

That someone was Nick Ryan and the site is Eurogamer.net .

The article is titled Gold Trading Exposed: Introduction , which is the first of a 4-part series on the RMT industry. Ryan’s first post gives readers an overview of "this burgeoning and controversial market". In it, he refers to me as Extreme Gamer (not sure why since all my signatures in my correspondences have the moniker Extreme Gold Fan in them. Oh well…) Please check it out and tell me what you think. As of this writing, Ryan’s post has generated 79 comments. I’d like my WoW Gold Facts readers to join in the discussion and give me their two cents’ worth on the article. Was it a fair introduction? Were both sides given equal print space for their respective views? Were the analogies and references harsh? (I found that remark about RMT being akin to prostitution quite extreme!) Did EGF sound lucid enough?

I’ll give you my two cents’ worth after I’ve had a pot of coffee and re-read the article with a clearer head (hard to discuss something this heavy at 5:30 AM). In the meantime, feel free to deluge me with your reactions, violent or otherwise. You’ll definitely be hearing from me.

Oh, and don’t think I forgot that I owe you kiddies a new review. There IS a new review in the works. But this Nick Ryan article is just too hot to not discuss! Catch ya later.

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1 Comment »

I know this post is highly off-topic but please indulge me or else I will kill myself.

If there’s one thing you ought to know about those high society weddings, no matter how pedigreed and proper and tasteful the affair, at some point a good number of people - already inebriated - will try to liven things up at the reception by injecting something low-brow and tasteless.

Like a (bleep)ing karaoke jam.

Which is my signal to skedaddle and take a French leave.

Unfortunately, I was with my elegant and gracious parents and siblings who frown on French leaves and believe in "grinning and bearing" it all.

Doubly unfortunately for me, my mother had zeroed in on one of the bridesmaids whom she thought would make a "suitable girl" for me to get to know better (read: date).

Triply unfortunately for me, my cousin the bridegroom - already drunk yet aware of my mother’s matchmaking goal that evening - called on me and THAT bridesmaid to take our turn at the (bleeping) karaoke, much to my horror (and near cardiac arrest). The guests cheered.

"Dude, get up, don’t be rude!" my brother chided me. I gave him my biggest scowl.

My mother was delighted. "Darling, come on, be a sport."

"Mother, I f***ing hate karaoke!" I hissed. She gasped. My sister tried her best not to smirk.

My dad gave me a look that could kill a herd of buffalo. "Don’t you ever use that language again when talking to your mother or any one for that matter, young man. Now get up on the stage!" He growled.

OMFG.

The bridesmaid - let’s call her Mia - smiled coyly at me as she handed me my own mic.  Now I know you kiddies are wondering what she looks like. Er, she looks like a really nice young lady but let’s just say she’s not my type. Or Remus’ type. Or even skirt-chasing Cletus’ type (which is saying a lot considering that Cletus would hit on anything that wears a skirt). I fumbled with the mic as my cousin introduced me to the crowd as the "mysterious brooding relative who, deep inside, is a romantic old soul who loves long walks on the beach and is looking for Ms Right."

My jaw dropped as the crowd whooped and clapped. Where the f*** did that come from? Whatever happened to "my cousin the WoW nut and future Martin Scorcese?" Long walks on the beach? I can’t even stand the short walk from my apartment to the nearest Rite-Aid for my meds!

But there was no time to hit back and be rude, ’cause the retard in charge of the karaoke machine had slapped on the song Something Stupid for me and Mia to warble to each other. Then followed the longest three minutes of my life. I sounded like a bullfrog with a head cold. Mia sounded okay. If I thought I turned her off with my singing voice, I was wrong. To my utmost horror, she seemed….smitten!

"I didn’t know you can sing," she said, smiling widely. "We should do this again."  Oh come on!!!

That was it, I left ahead of my family. The next day, I ditched riding back home with them and took the Metro. I called Cletus and Remus to meet me in Grand Central and to take me to a place where there’s no cell phone signal.

‘Cause Mia’s text messages and calls just won’t (bleep)ing stop!

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1 Comment »

Kiddies, I’m going away for a few days. Someone’s getting married in New Haven. Hell no, it’s not me. It’s my cousin who found himself a nice girl at some charity ball and is carrying out family tradition by wedding her in a lily-white ceremony, announced on engraved stationery bearing the family seal. No thanks to him, my mom’s nagging has gotten worse — Are there plans in your future to get into a healthy, happy relationship with a nice young lady or are you just so content being with your shiftless friends? You ARE straight, right?

For the record: yes, Mom, I AM straight and Cletus and Remus are NOT shiftless. Like me, they’re merely enjoying their early twenties minus the shackles and hassles of premature monogamy and the you-left-the-toilet-seat-up morning debates.

I completely forgot about this wedding and I’m pressured to find a decent tux that doesn’t have ruffles. I promised my mom that I will not say or do anything to embarrass her, and that I will NOT mention the words World of Warcraft, Warcraft, toon, character, leveling up, MMOs when and if a nice young lady (read: potential daughter-in-law of hers) asks me what I do for fun.

God, the things I do to appear normal!

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6 Comments »

You kiddies are probably shocked senseless by the title. EGF - Mr. Emily Post of WoW? Did hell just freeze over?

Okay, so I admit that my vocabulary can be pretty colorful when I fly off the handle BUT when UN provoked, I am actually a pretty decent fellow who goes by life’s rules. I’m just misunderstood at times. There are people who can’t deal with the way I don’t mince words when I’m not happy — just go ask my friends and family, especially my family’s social circle. I’ve been called Damien and Rosemary’s Baby (doesn’t help that my mom’s middle name is Rosemary). One summer in Nantucket, when I was little and a real livewire, I overheard my mother’s nouveau riche biatch guest’s pointed comment: "That Claire, I swear, I can’t believe she went behind her husband’s back and slept with the devil. Now we have Satan’s spawn running around us and terrorizing our children." For the record, I wasn’t terrorizing that dame’s equally snobby kids. I only happened to make her bully son cry by telling him, "I heard someone is suing your dad for stealing money and when he goes to jail you’re all gonna go to the poorhouse and you’re gonna have to sell your toys!" Classic EGF!

Again, just for the record, I am never mean to people but I can get nasty to those who are really asking for it. I’m big on keeping the peace, even in WoW, believe it or not. Just because slaying beasts and other toons is part of the game doesn’t mean the slaughter extends to demeaning the person behind those characters. Just because you’re in the 60s, 70s and 80s doesn’t mean you have carte blanche to make fun of clueless newbies. Just ’cause…

Okay, just to get everything in order, here is a list of things for all you uncouth cavemen in the game to bear in mind:

1. Thou shall not hit on pretty blood elf females by dropping cringe-inducing pick-up lines. (*cough* Cletus *cough*). These girls play WoW because they like the game and not because they’re hoping to snag some testosterone-driven Neanderthal. You want a fling? Cybersex? Go to those adult hook-up sites. Word of warning: there are real men who play those blood elf chicks. Like me. Ah, will never forget the day Cletus hit on me hoping to get some action in a private corner. You should’ve read his whisper the second I said, ‘I’m now removing my boxers, handsome". Fastest log out I’ve ever seen in my life too. Tsk tsk.

2. Before inviting someone to group with you, say hi first. Um, this is really very basic. Not everyone likes joining groups or has plans to join a group on certain days (I don’t like grouping if I have a backlog of quests of my own and need to carry them out solo). Better to ask first if grouping is okay with that person instead of slamming down the invite right away. That way, there will be no hard feelings if an invite is declined. I once declined a group invite and I got called a (insert unmentionable part of the female anatomy here, starts with C and ends with T). Ain’t WoW society a refined bunch?

3. Thou shall not insult newbies for asking ‘where is Mankrik’s wife?’. Nor shall you mislead them by making them enter Ragefire Chasm to find the missus. That is outright cruel!!!

4. Thou shall not be  a ninja looter. We all hate ninja looters. If WoW ever imposed the death sentence (and I mean a permanent death), the first ones to go are ninja looters. There is no place in Azeroth for greedy little bastids like you.

5. Thou shall NOT ask newbies to pay you for helping them complete a quest. This is one of the most appalling, most shameless things I’ve encountered in the game. How do you expect new people to stay in WoW if you play the jackass ambassador? Correction: a greedy, selfish jackass ambassador who thinks nothing of depriving the poorest toons of their copper.

6. Thou shall give buffs to lowbies if your toon can give them. Lowbies will learn kindness and eventually "pay it forward" to others in need.

7. Thou shall help a fellow Horde (or fellow Ally) when you see he’s dangerously close to getting killed. Merely staring while his or her HP goes down makes you the High Priest of Insensitivity.

8. Thou shall NOT help a fellow Horde (or fellow Ally) when you see he’s handling himself pretty well. I know some people who like to bring their mounted DKs to lowbie towns so they can show them off to the "little players" and "help them" slay Hogger or Fizzle Darkstorm. Dude, for all you know, these "little people" have DKs or extreme highbies for their main toons so ya ain’t exactly gonna impress them. You’ll only tick them off if you intervene without being asked to. Nobody appreciates an eager Helpy Helperton Carebear. In fact, they’ll just tell you to (bleep) off.

9. Thou shall not use the Barrens chat, or any channel for that matter, to publicly humilate people asking reasonable questions. There are no stupid questions, only stupid people who brand clueless newbies "retards". I find that the people who love to humiliate others are the ones who can’t spell, can’t complete quests on their own and who have the most godawful toons. If a Horde could attack a fellow Horde any second of the day I would love to roundhouse-kick those little (bleep)ing denizens of the Barrens chat just to shut them up.

And last BUT NOT THE LEAST…

10. Thou shall NOT ask for gold like it’s something that should be given away. This really ticks me off . I know from experience that the same people who slam RMT are the same people who panhandle for gold in the game. Oh you pathetic SOBs, so much for your "there’s beauty and honor in pure grinding" sh*t! Why can’t you admit that grinding is a pain and start buying some gold? Or if you’re still hellbent on being anti-RMT, then at the very least stop crying poor, quit hassling people for doleouts and grind away. And while you’re at it, savor the "beauty and honor" of it while my friends and I ride our awesome mounts past you and towards the next big kill. Life is good, no?

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9 Comments »

No, Kiddies, I’m not quitting. As the title says, the No Gold Diet Challenge is just on temp hold and here’s why:

I got a phone call last night from my WoW buddy Alvin who wanted to say hello and ask me where the (bleep) I was last Saturday when the Horde needed me most. Thankfully, before I could open my big mouth and say I was playing my lowbie Dwarf Rogue, he dropped the first stinker:

"Do you know how many (bleep)ing times the Crossroads was attacked?" Now if you think I have a potty mouth, Alvin’s own vocabulary can make me look like Pope John Paul II.

"Twice?"

"Hell (bleep)ing no! At least six times while I was online! (Bleep)ing Allies (bleep)ing attacked Crossroads and Camp T and Ratchet. (Bleep)ing (bleep) dwarf and night elf with their (bleep)ing mounts!"

"Who the hell even bothers to attack Ratchet??" I laughed. Seriously, why would anyone bother attacking Ratchet and its little green men??? There’s just no challenge there; it’s like taking candy from a baby.

"Beats the hell out of me! The same (bleep)ing dwarf killed Jorn Skyseer in Camp T and camped his corpse and my girlfriend couldn’t hand over her quest to Jorn because (bleep)ing midget kept killing him! (Bleep) the Alliance!"

"Uh huh, I’m really sorry to hear about Jorn."  Why the hell was I talking like Jorn was a real person and I was tight with him?

"So where the hell where you last Saturday, EGF?"

"Had to drive Mom to Connecticut."  Had to drive my Dwarf to the next level actually.

"I see. well while you were probably mingling with the little old rich ladies there we were running from Crossroads to Ratchet to Camp T and back to Crossroads and those (bleep)ing Allies kept (bleep)ing killing us! Ever been owned by a Dwarf???"

Well, I own a Dwarf toon but…. I bit my tongue.

"He’s on my kill list. His name is XXXXXX and he (bleeped) my Tauren in the a$$! I saw him kill Mankrik! No one touches Mankrik! Mankrik is my bitch!"

"Well, look at the bright side, at least it wasn’t a gnome."  Alvin is taking this too seriously.

"Well, here’s a guild message for you, buddy: Starting today until the next two weeks WE ARE ATTACKING ALLIANCE TOWNS AND CITIES. We will avenge the Horde!"

"You are, I mean, WE are?"

"YES! (Bleep) the Alliance, we will attack every goddamn lowbie town and city where all the (bleep)ing dwarves and gnomes live. And we will only use toons in the 60s! Use your best hunter with that cool pet. What’s that pet’s name again? Zoloft?"

"Prozac. Alvin, you really mean EVERY lowbie town and city?"

"Yeah, starting with that (bleeping) Dun Morogh! Leave no survivors! And when we’re done with those gay gnomes and gay dwarves we’ll kill those gay night elves next!"

My stomach turned. My dwarf rogue is still in Dun Morogh and I had scheduled my No Gold Diet Challenge gaming for three consecutive evenings this week to catch up.

"And here’s something else: because of that bloodbath in the Barrens the guild decided to add this new rule: during those two weeks any guildie with an Ally toon caught playing his (bleep)ing Ally will be fined 300 gold!"

AH (BLEEP)!!!!!!!!!!

So yeah, kiddies, that’s my reason and thank you for understanding. The Dwarf’s saga will resume after two weeks. Peace!

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10 Comments »

Kiddies, thanks for your submissions. Now it’s just a matter of zeroing in on the first kill, I mean, WoW gold seller. Of course, I also have to check if any of your suggestions are connected or affiliated with sites I’ve reviewed in the past. Any connections/affiliations found I will have to decline your suggestions, my apologies in advance.

I wasn’t amused though when one of you emailed me saying I should review WoWGoldHog. Excuse me, but why should I give my money to a site that ripped off another site in the most offensively conspicuous manner? It’s bad enough that the impostor Hog’s owners hate me and would love to see my head on a platter; it’s worse to give my hard-earned money to a bunch of scammers and making them a few dollars richer (I’d rather give the money to my favorite charity — ME). And say, speaking of that a$$hat, have you seen the WoWGoldHog complaint filed at Complaintsboard.com? Why do a review here  when someone else has beaten me to the punch?  *chuckles* (Thanks to reader Lestat for sharing that URL, by the way).

Anyway, it’s 4 in the morning and I should go back to bed. I’ll work on the new review after I pay the usual bills, and crossing my fingers there should be enough money left in my account for some WoW gold!

Later, everybody.

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Oh God, I think I’m going to choke soon, I just know.

But just to prove I am still trying very hard to stick to the deal, here are screenshots of my latest gaming:

Before leaving the inn I saw the Rogue Trainer to learn Backstab, Gouge, Sinister Strike and Pick Pocket. Probably the same person that trains young ruffians who later on become hardened criminals in NY. Kidding.



Back to the Wendigos. Sigh:



20 minutes of slaying my collection is still 4/8.



After several minutes I finally gathered all 8 manes. Hooray! Ran off to gather that ammo for Rumbleshot. 2 quests completed!



Then it was off to train for two professions: mining and engineering.



Mined my first copper ore.



This should earn me some money soon. I’m down to 3 silver because of repairs and training for new spells.

3 silver. I feel so poor.

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4 Comments »

Warning: Screenshot below shows a gutter-mouthed comment from reader with the alias Kemo with IP address (used a proxy, you coward?) 97.121.51.93. Do not read if you are easily offended. Don’t say I didn’t warn ya!

I’m posting this for a good laugh. I mean, seriously, I’ve been accused of being potty-mouthed and childish and racist but go check out this retarded Gay4Game, I mean Guy4Game, sympathizer’s ’s "constructive comment".  Kemo, you cretin, I was not THAT rude to the agent. I didn’t even swear at her! You were either reading too fast or on too much crack, hence you got all upset. And yeah, they were taking too long to answer so how’s that for great customer support? What’s comforting about the explanation that their internet connection is unstable? And as for you, what’s with your "f***ing Indian" comment? You have something against our Indian brothers and sisters and Bollywood? Drop the haughty "I’m-the-superior-race" mentality, kid, the sun set on the Empire a long time ago. Just try asking the Jaguar Cars folks.

Here’s your 15 minutes of fame, loser. And do me a favor - take your filthy, uncensored Barrens chat back to the, er, Barrens chat.



You know you love me!

XOXO,

EGF

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